UBER Definition! Holographic MegaSex!
by boh3m3 on Apr.23, 2008, under Rants
Every time I hear about the next big breakthrough in graphics or special effects I have this kneejerk reflex that makes me immediately vomit blood for five to seven minutes after. After the incident at E3 some years back, EA Games doesn’t invite me to their annual “Booze-and-Bragfest” cocktail mixers.
For as long as I can remember the movie, television, and video game industries have been “Keeping up with the Joneses” in the realm of delivering a better image of a mousetrap. As Magritte would say, “Ceci n’est pas une Holodeck.”
My main gripe with this industrial game of leapfrog is that we, the little people, tend to get jumped over faster than the next in line. It’s a regular complaint of mine that you can’t buy toilet paper without a better version coming out 4 days later. You are wiping your ass with Quilted v1.5.255d. Upgrade now?
Perhaps it’s me showing my age or my plutonium-grade retroslutism, but I would be thrilled if they went back and really explored the limits of the Sega Genesis. Pixel graphics have so much charm and possibility that I think in the race to the DreamCast it was greatly overlooked. Of course eventually the industry would have had to move forward, but with the speed of technology going obsolete, it’s like buying a ham sandwich that tastes like shit two bites in.
I realize that there’s not a chance that this sort of thing would happen, of course. I guess I’m fulfilling my duty by supplying the retro elitism that is asked for by the Great Sphincter of the Cosmos.
A Prayer to the Great Sphincter of the Cosmos
by boh3m3
Oh Sphincter, Great Sphincter!
Mighty Clenching Colonmuscle of the Cosmos!
Bless us with your gasseous inspiration,
And lead us not to the creative constipation
that comes when we eat too much Everyday Cheese!
Amen!
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April 24th, 2008 on 3:59 am
why dont you just not but anything new. wouldnt that be exactly the same as them not making anything new?
April 24th, 2008 on 4:48 am
Hahaha nick’s got a point. The sandwich tastes exactly the same, you’ve just seen one that looks nicer. I think the lesson here is to find a platform you like and stick with it, ignoring all the shiny temptations just out of reach…
Of course the problem with that is, eventually people stop making games / accessories / parts for it.
April 24th, 2008 on 9:31 am
There’s at least one company still exploring the Sega MegaDrive’s gaming potential, though I’ll be jiggered if I know why they chose to do it commercially. Have a look at http://www.beggarprince.com/ and join me in hoping such projects soon become both cheaper and more common.
Of course, there will always be romhackers who push the boundaries of known hardware - the Commodore Amiga and Atari ST cracking groups often used to put self-made intros on their cracked software, containing great music and elaborate visuals that often (for me) caused the sound and graphics in the game look somewhat lackluster by comparison. I’ve seen a ZX Spectrum demo that copied the kind of things they used to do in those intros, and I have to admit that I was pretty much blown away by how little difference there was between the Amiga and Spectrum versions.
The old cry of “all graphics and no gameplay” may be a cliché, but it’s a cliché for a reason, and it’s one I happen to agree with wholeheartedly. I’ve always been of the opinion that people are forging ahead too quickly to really make proper use of what they already have, and to be honest, that rampant obsoletism is why I’m exclusively an emulation gamer nowadays.
April 24th, 2008 on 9:37 am
*sigh* Oh, the days of sitting around playing SMB on my NES listening to the radio that had foil on the antenna to pick up one of the 2 radio stations I could in the middle of nowhere, Alabama.
Now that was fun.
Sure, they’re making everything look prettier now, but it’s still the same old concept. If you make it, they will play.
April 24th, 2008 on 10:46 pm
sigh i miss dreamcast days that was my baby it STILL is, i tend to find myself playing it more often then the wii or xbox.. just stick with what u got and not go towards “oo shiny things” what you have is just fine
April 25th, 2008 on 10:17 pm
Let me tell you, I was playing Mario cart on Nintendo 64 at a friends house and I felt better then I have in years playing so many other game systems. (The pixel goodness made it all the better! I wish more games were made to be pixel goodness. I missed it.)
I think it might be because it made me feel like I was a kid again, care free, just having fun. Not that thats what a lot of game makers are looking for, with their Rated G games. But it’s one of the things that made me keep turning it on ever hour or so to beat a new course time score. XD; Maybe they should look into that instead.