Dear World, From a Person Who has Survived Two “Doomsdays”
by boh3m3 on Sep.10, 2008, under Dear World
From a Person Who has Survived Two “Doomsdays”
Dear world,
Is something wrong?
I mean, it seems like every benchmark of civilization and relative development can’t pass without some group calling it the end of the world.
The year 2000? Certain doom by God’s wrath or gas station pumps launching nuclear missiles in Wisconsin or something. All I got out of the new years’ party was to hear the ONLY year (ONLY) Prince’s “1999″ is a good idea, and an awkward kiss that broke up a middle-school friendship with a cute blonde.
- AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHoh it really doesn’t matter yet. Hm. Fig Newtons!
It seems the activation of the LHC was heralded as yet another way we, as fellow humans, might have accidentally fucked off and killed ourselves. I’m happy to say that either we’re existing in an event horizon in which time slows to a near stop before being pulled in with time and light itself into a crushing abyss, or it’s another early wednesday morning for me.
Now what bothers me is that the steps that are bringing us closer and closer to an Earth Union and, inevitably flying cars and Firefly-class cargo ships (complete with eclectic and fun crew!) are being jumped on as the big “off button.” Do these people WANT to die before they can sing the opening song from Firefly in earnest? Do they WANT the whole planet to pop before they get their own landspeeder?
The next major apocalypse I can tell is scheduled for December 21st, 2012 according to the Mayan calendar. It appears that the dissapointed Y2K doomsayers are aligning with the “savage prophets” just to have something to do and to use their dry-erase picket boards. According to Steve Alten, we need a mental patient whose parents were Mayan archaeologists.
Honestly, I think I’m jaded enough to the point of complete nonchalance with this new spam-email of hogwash (BOULDERDASH! FRIDDERICK WALTHAMSTONE!). But perhaps that day will bring us closer to a worldwide system of peace… just so we can finally get bored enough of this rock to want to get off it.
So everybody just chill out and vibe so we can stop freaking out every superstitiously marked day of the year.
Because I like spaceships.
Loading ...Apocalypse now? 30 days when the world didn’t end (via The Times Online)
Hey! Just thought I would rap this one out since I had some free time. Kinda took over my focus for a while. I’m already finished with the next article, which will be titled “A Day in the Life of ZeFrank”, once it’s posted. Might have to substitute Ze’s head though for copyright protection. Anyhow thanks for all the people reading and voting and COMMENTING! You guys are the shits, without all the bowel pain. Till next post.
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September 10th, 2008 on 6:09 am
I must say that if the world was destroyed by a black hole created by the LHC, I reckon it would be pretty bloody trippy just before the end, maybe. I was watching the news at the time the LHC was switched on and thankfully they let me know that because they were still on air, the LHC hadn’t destroyed the world…just in case I hadn’t noticed.
September 10th, 2008 on 6:19 am
I’m using firefox 3, for some reason I can’t vote / click links on your site. Fine in IE though.
I’ve never seen firefly, is it any good?
September 10th, 2008 on 7:44 am
I have the same problems in Chrome and Ff3
At any rate…about the Mayan thing.
All Mayab books and such were destroyed by some Christian jackass, and that same jackass realized what a jackass he was, and had people rewrite everything by memory…I wouldn’t look too far into it.
Space ships are indeed awesome. I want to get onto that spacestation NASA will have completely built in 2010 or so.
Sadly, you probably have to be rich or win a lottery, AND, I don’t want to be a test subject.
Now about you dressing as a girl in need for her weenis’ protection skills…
September 10th, 2008 on 8:14 am
i never really worried about the end of the world, i worry more about finding enough money for breakfast.
September 10th, 2008 on 8:18 am
Thiefree: Firefly is one of the greatest shows ever created, as is Serenity, the movie that followed the one-season show. There is currently a petition going on for Joss Whedon to create a second season. I sincerely recommend watching the show. It’s amazing. =]
September 10th, 2008 on 9:03 am
Brandon: Amen to that. However, sometimes I worry about what will happen after it ends.
September 10th, 2008 on 10:50 am
My goodness, it’s great to finally see someone who’s thinking the same way as me. All I have bloody heard or read the past three days is “ZOMGZ, WE’RE GOING TO DIE!”
Drives me nuts how ignorant and stupid so many people on this planet are. - Maybe they deserve a black hole.
September 10th, 2008 on 12:03 pm
joiywtj: yesterday i was driving, and as i stopped at a red light i looked at a tree, and thought about how there is always the possibility that the tree might not be there tomorrow, i also thought about the day to day dangers we face as humans, such as astroids like the one heading for earth right now, solar flares, the next ice age which is coming. things of this nature. that tree simply grows, and lives. trees dont worry. but we do. that tree honestly must have been alive for over a hundred years, and will probably be here when i am gone. i guess i figured out a long time ago that the earth is going to be just fine when our time as humans comes to a close. at least until the sun explodes. i just try to understand that there is a time when my life will end and i live well enough to not have regrets. and hopefully i can touch one or two peoples lives along the way.
September 10th, 2008 on 3:18 pm
Brandon: I agree. I actually I meant I wonder if there’s an after life. I worry about that because…though I’m not a bad person…I’m far from a good person as well.
I think the earth will be far better off when we’re done, or when/if we dumb down.
September 11th, 2008 on 5:12 am
Ben! You fixed it!
Chrome and Ff3 are embracing your website, rather than shunning it.
September 11th, 2008 on 7:44 am
@Antha: Thanks for the recommendation! Clearly I need to check it out. O’course, the only way I can do that in the UK is by investing in the DVD, so I’ll wait until I’m feeling impulse-buy-y.
September 11th, 2008 on 6:09 pm
@Thiefree: Yes, Firefly and Serenity are by far the best things that have ever come from a partnership wit FOX.
Oh! And is the site working for you now?
September 11th, 2008 on 6:11 pm
@joiywtj: I don’t know if I’d be up for muscular atrophy and shitting in a bag. I mean, it would be fun for all of an hour, then I’d get bothered when I eventually run out of cool things to do with water and jell-O in zero-G.
September 11th, 2008 on 6:12 pm
@Venuschild : I can see the Hallmark cards now…
“Roses are red
Violets are blue
Black holes are crushing, atom-splitting death
and so are you”
September 11th, 2008 on 8:31 pm
@Thiefree: You’re welcome.
As for the whole end of the world thing; i have made plans to be drunk december 20th through the 21st, that way i probably won’t feel it. And if i do…oh well. Hopefully the searing pain of whatever apocalyptic situation we find ourselves in only last for a few minutes. Live the life you’ve got now, try to be nice to our planet, and hope it isn’t some probe-wielding alien or sickness a la ‘Doomsday’[if you're into gorey movies, that one has the best i've seen yet, btw, and because of that i can forgive the faintly Mad Max-like storyline] that will torture earth’s population into insanity and cannibalistic tribes.
@joiywtj: Regarding the afterlife situation; i’ve been feeling the exact same way lately. I know i’m not a bad person, but i’m not mother teresa or anything, either. For a lot of religions, that means i’m automatically going to hell. Right now i’m just trying to lead the best life i can, and if that doesn’t get me into heaven, or anything of the sort, i guess that just kind of sucks for me, huh? I don’t want to have to worry about it seconds before i’m going to die, but i don’t want to have to worry about it 24-7 either.
September 12th, 2008 on 8:06 am
Has anyone ever thought the Mayan prophecy about the end of the world might simply signify the end of an era? It might just mean the world order is going to change, something big is going to happen that will alter the way humans think of themselves and everything around them forever. Something like that. All that “0MZWTFR0FLMA0LULZFTWZ0RZWE’REALLG0NNADIE!!!!11one” bullshit is getting old.
Seriously.
And Firefly kicks ass. *Likes spaceships too, much.*
P.S. I had some problems with the site for a while, but it’s all good now. Is it supposed to be all weird and red, though?
September 12th, 2008 on 9:00 am
I just read the next post and realized this is the actual theme, not some poop of my browser (Camino is the pretty bastard’s name). That is the one of the most stupid and annoying things about me - I see/hear/read something shocking or strange and go off screaming about it without trying to search for an explanation first. *Hits herself with a shovel.*
September 13th, 2008 on 1:24 am
the world did’ent end?
shit.
guess i still gotta pay back my over draft.
on the bright side i consider this blog to be a solom promise by you, boh3m3, that i will have my own landspeeder and the hot enginer from firefly by the end of the week. now which should i ride first?